simonejester: danbo and an xbox360 controller (Default)


Things I Am No Longer
Allowed to Do at Hogwarts


 


---



Stolen blatantly from this
person's LiveJournal
, picked out my favorites, and edited for spelling,
grammar, and in a few cases, content.



Entries in green are ones I thought
up while compiling this list.




---


No matter how good a fake
Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of
Magical Creatures class.


---


Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic
mushrooms is not "an extra credit project for Herbology."


---


"I've heard every possible joke about
Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.


---


The Giant Squid is not an appropriate
date to the Yule Ball.


---


I will not use Umbridge's quill to
write "I told you I was hardcore."


---


Polishing my wand in the common room
is acceptable. "Polishing my wand" in the common room is not.


---


If a classmate falls asleep, I will
not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.


---


Starting a betting pool on the fate
of this year's Defense Against Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a
clever money-making concept.


---


snip! )
simonejester: sign says "homo sex is sin," word "great" covers "sin" ([queer] homo sex is great)
(in rich text because I'm feeling lazy)

lots of rich text )
simonejester: danbo and an xbox360 controller (Default)
Note: The vast majority of these were made up by others. I think I posted this back at orbitaldiamonds and asterisked the ones that I did make up myself. I found various lists on LJ back when I lived in Alaska (so between 2007 and 2010) and I have no idea who came up with the idea of making a Hogwarts Skippy List or any of the people who made these suggestions. Anyhow, enjoy!

Things I Am No Longer Allowed to Do at Hogwarts

---
Stolen blatantly from this person's LiveJournal, picked out my favorites, and edited for spelling, grammar, and in a few cases, content.
Entries in green are ones I thought up while compiling this list.
---
 No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.
---
Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not "an extra credit project for Herbology."
---
"I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.
---
The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.
---
I will not use Umbridge's quill to write "I told you I was hardcore."
---
Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. "Polishing my wand" in the common room is not.
---
If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
---
Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept.
---
Seamus Finnegan is not "after me Lucky Charms."
---
I will not refer to the Weasley twins as "bookends."
---
I will not refer to the Patil twins as "bookends."
---
I will not provide Luna Lovegood with Coast-to-Coast AM transcripts.
---
I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.
---
I will not place anything by Silver Ravenwolf on the library shelves.
---
I am not a sloth Animagus.
---
I am not a tribble Animagus.
---
I am allowed to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl. I am not allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.
---
I do not weigh the same as a duck.
---
I will stop asking the Arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is.
---
Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is coincidental.
---
I will not change the password to the prefects' bath to "Makes getting clean almost as much fun as getting dirty."
---
There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.
---
Asking "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and walking away is only funny the first time.
---
I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey.
---
I will not offer to pose nude for Dean Thomas.
---
It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape he takes himself too seriously.
---
It is a bad idea to tell Professor McGonagall she takes herself too seriously.
---
I am not to owl copies of the Evil Overlord List to suspected Death Eaters.
---
I will not teach the first-years to sing "A Wizard's Staff Has A Knob On The End."
---
much more )

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